They are there, confronting each and every one of us daily throughout life.

See challenges present opportunities.

People view challenges as a negative but I challenge you (I had to slip in the pun) to be open to them.

And I’ll show you why.

Open to Challenge, Open to Growth

If life was a breeze and had no ups and downs, just a straight line in one direction.

There would be nothing to it.

A boring, same old life with no new excitements or no new sufferings.

Just a plateau.

Once you understand that life is filled with both the good and the bad on purpose, you can start to appreciate a challenge.

Without the bad times, we wouldn’t appreciate the good times and vice versa.

It is the pain and suffering that each of us go through that gives us that liberating feeling when we do overcome a challenge or accomplish a goal.

The same with the saying ‘if it were easy, everyone would do it’.

The challenge is what allows us to grow.

It gives us purpose.

The better you become at accepting challenges, the more efficient you become at overcoming them.

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It’s something that is a constant trial and error.

Never-ending.

You continually push each day and week until your limit is hit and then you must pause to recover.

Before trying again a few days or week later.

Just like in the gym with growing muscle.

Your muscle fibres need to be consistently ripped apart to grow back stronger.

The limit here is the weight you can lift.

The heavier lifts come after years of pushing your initial limits.

Same with a mental limit.

You may start with 1 page of a book in a day.

And work your way up to 10 pages a day.

It’s all about finding your limits, then testing them and pushing on from there.

Why do we care about our limits?

Once we understand our limits, we can use them to our advantage.

They can help us set goals and allow us to push to achieve them.

Fulfilment comes from the growth through limit pushing.

Thus, if you allow yourself to continue to push limits, you’ll continue to be fulfilled and more so when it includes helping others.

That gives you true purpose.

But you have to push through the initial discomfort to expand your limits.

Be real with yourself, learn your limits and learn when to push them.

If you push too much too fast, you’ll burnout.

Burnout?

Burnout phase occurs when you push your limits when you shouldn’t.

It’s not normal to grind 24/7.

Burnout makes you become less efficient.

You need to take the reins of the horse.

You need to take control of the car.

You control the speed.

But ultimately, once the horse is tired or you run out of fuel, you need to learn to slow down before ramping back up.

Why is it never-ending?

Once you hit a goal, you always want another one.

That is why you must get glued to the journey, not the goal.

For the goal is merely one of many while the journey is your’s only and your only one.

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“There’s no chance you are able to do that!”

“Yeah good luck with that - have you seen yourself?”

Ah, the beauty of opinions.

Everyone has them but rarely are they actually useful to your own life and/or situation.

Everyday you’re surrounded by them and the hardest part is deciphering which are actually helpful and which are pointless.

You may think something positive from someone is a comment you should filter through however, even then, people chuck half-hearted compliments to either request something from you or to make themselves feel like they are doing good.

Today, we are going to discuss positive vs negative feedback and why it’s vital you learn to love the correct feedback.

Why Feedback is Vital

To grow as a human, we all require assistance in some aspects.

There are people older and wiser than us that can help direct us to the path we want to be on or even people younger and dumber than us that can open our eyes to thoughts or perspectives that aren’t all that bad.

We are all here to learn from each other and it’s your job to pick apart which bits of information you implement into your lives.

Let’s face it, we’ve all had those deep conversation with someone at 3am around a kitchen counter while sinking the last beer from the fridge thinking “yeah, this person knows exactly what’s up”.

Is the advice or life lessons from that person at 3am bad? Most of the time, but it doesn’t always have to be like that.

Good Feedback Exists!?

If people are giving you feedback in the correct manner, they are trying to help you.

Especially when they are constructive with the way they say it and it is an aspect of your life you are trying to improve.

There is no point listening to someone tell you advice about table tennis when you have no interest of improving or learning about it.

Of course, listen to their stories but you don’t have to absorb every granular detail and feel forced to play.

This is about aspects you WANT to improve in.

Whether it is a subject at school, a hobby on the side you want to pick up or even some tasks at work, there’s always room to improve somewhere - you just NEED to WANT to improve.

Now, if said person has told you some great feedback on your skill but you take it as an insult, then you need to work on that issue within yourself.

No one is perfect at everything and I’d argue no one is perfect at anything.

With this mindset alone, you remove your ego of thinking you are 10/10 at said aspect.

For example, you work for a sales team and just closed a $50k deal.

Of course you’re going to feel good but that doesn’t mean you’re perfect.

And if the head of sales tells you what you could have done even better, don’t get offended.

Stay open-minded and see where they are coming from.

Then act on their feedback.

If it’s bad feedback, you still learn what not to do.

It simply breaks down into 2 paths:

• Issue with feedback or;

• Issue with you.

“This was rubbish” = bad feedback.

The above gives us no direction or steps on how to improve - it’s just a statement.

Good feedback is always followed by a why.

Just because the feedback is filled with negative (bad) points, that doesn’t determine whether the feedback is good or not.

Remember, it’s always followed by a why - that’s the good feedback.

Now the best feedback is followed with how after they why.

You get told the the steps on why you weren’t the best and then how you can get to the next level.

Removing your emotions from comments from others when they are trying to help you will help improve your overall ability.

Feedback is like the steps you need to jump and grow in skill and confidence.

You shouldn’t be hitting your head on the steps because you failed to accept the feedback.

You should be easily jumping from one to the other as you level up in life from feedback.

The more you learn to love feedback, the more you gain the skill to decipher the bad and good bits of feedback.

The more you grow as a person.

The better the world can become.

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He said, if you change 1 letter from, ‘I got to’ do something to ‘I get to’ do something, your perspective instantly changes - and the crazy part is, it’s true.

If you say everyday you have to go do something, it sounds to me like you are forced to go do it and that it is a negative action; not something you enjoy.

Whereas, if you are saying you get to do something, you are sounding very grateful and viewing that specific task as an opportunity rather than a burden.

This new perspective on the world helps you look for opportunities.

It creates an abundant mindset.

And when you have an abundant mindset, you start to see that the possibilities in life are endless.

This helps cultivate a fulfilling life; something I believe we should all be chasing.

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We set big goals for the year in hopes to achieve them throughout the year.

As I’ve gone through the cycle 25 times now (only really comprehending it say 10 times), I’ve noticed a lot of us set too much at once and try to achieve them as quickly as possible.

We try to change our whole lifestyle within the first few weeks and get annoyed when the results aren’t there.

Then what happens?

We give up.

Welcome to the New Years Effect.

How to Achieve Goals?

Start small, then scale.

If you do believe and set yourself New Years goals, don’t expect them to instantly be achieved - it could and most likely take whole year.

Just because you hit a barrier, don’t give up.

Find a way around it, over it, under it.

It takes time and effort to hit goals not minutes (like ordering food on your phone).

I’m an avid gym user and I see the same thing each year.

January is packed, newcomers trying to change their health.

I love to see it and support everyone striving for a healthy life.

Yet, by February, we’ve lost a good chunk of people.

They fall back into old bad habits and have given up.

Why?

Because the results lacked.

All because they didn’t allow time to be on their side.

Instead?

They gave up before time could show its true colours and give them the results their input (effort) was delivering.

Remember, you choose your hard.

You choose to be healthy or choose to be unhealthy.

The difference is the healthy option is greeted with hard straight away while the unhealthy option makes your life harder later down the line.

Avoiding the Burnout

If you try to completely 180 your lifestyle and push yourself too much too soon, you can easily burnout too within the first few weeks of January and I wouldn’t be surprised if you’ve experienced that when starting on a new venture towards a fresh goal.

How do we avoid this?

Learn your boundaries.

Then, over time, push effort to slowly extend them.

You don’t plant a seed in your garden and expect it to flourish by tomorrow.

Quality things take time.

You just need to cultivate the environment where time plays out to your advantage.

The consistency throughout the year through small actions will lead to the big triumph at the end of the year.

Trust the process.

Enjoy the journey.

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And it’s a valid question.

When you call someone lazy, it never means a positive attribute and most strive away from being lazy.

However, I’m here to tell you that it’s possible to actually be lazy, but productive at the same time.

Paradoxical, I know.

But hear me out…

Laziness

Everyone has so much potential with their lives yet as humans, we tend to always crave comfort.

Blame our brains for that.

We naturally want to survive and survival comes through comfort (usually).

If comfort is achieved, our brains can relax.

However, being comfortable in today’s world is too easy and actually stunts humans.

Being a couch potato means indulging in content but not engaging your brain properly.

It consumes, consumes, consumes and never creates.

Doing this consecutively for a period of time leads to a smaller and smaller comfort zone and next thing you know, the slightest change in your mundane routine causes anxiety and havoc inside that head of yours.

Laziness = comfort = weaker.

Why should we care?

Well, if you’re bored of life, hate your job or school or just want to feel alive again, you’re most likely stuck inside your comfort zone and needing to break free.

The irony is, your hatred of life becomes worse by doing the behaviours your brain is craving which is, more comfort.

So, it’s not an easy feat to break free to begin with.

Unlocking that Superpower!

I personally view myself as very lazy.

In my mind, I’m able to do tasks so quickly because of my laziness.

How?

By combining tasks to save time.

For example, brushing my teeth in shower.

I combined two monotonous tasks into 1 to save time but still get the job done, just as good.

My brain is wired to constantly look for ways to save time whether it be personal tasks, work tasks or even physical tasks.

There’s always an efficient way to do them.

Embracing my brain’s laziness has allowed me to achieve more, by doing less.

I do less amounts of tasks by combining them where I can to help combat that feeling of being overwhelmed by a big to do list.

And the beauty of it?

It snowballs.

The more you do the smaller tasks and tick them off, the greater you feel and the faster you go.

Next thing you know is you’ve run out of tasks and have the time to think about new things or even challenge your mind in other ways which you couldn’t do previously if you had just remaining that couch potato.

Everyone has such massive potential to do great - sometimes you just need a push off the sofa.

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Especially the monotonous tasks like brushing your teeth, eating the same meals if on a diet or even just waking up at the same time each day.

These routines can quickly become boring as on the surface, they aren’t exactly dopamine inducing.

And the irony is, we all want life to be fun yet the majority of our lives are full of these tasks.

Solution?

Make your routine fun.

The Gamification of Life

If you’re competitive like myself, turning each task and life in general into a game helps create that aspect of fun.

You are trying to beat your past time or score each day which remove the feeling of the tasks being boring.

It’s easy to get lost in the boringness of the tasks and not see the bigger picture of them helping structure your life.

With hobbies, it’s easier as you enjoy them because you get to choose what you are doing, when you are doing it and why.

Incorporate challenges within your routine which challenge yourself:

• How fast can you get ready for bed?

• Did you wake up and get out of bed on time and faster than yesterday?

• How fast did you make breakfast?

These small monotonous tasks that we do daily take up most of our lives, so why not try to enjoy them?

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When opinions are flooded into your vicinity consistently everyday, they become hard to ignore.

If everyday someone keeps sending negative messages either directly to you or posts about something negative, you’ll no doubt feel more negative as the day’s roll on.

Your surroundings play a massive impact on your mental state and being in an environment which breeds this negative thought trail only leads to more negativity.

The key here is to understand who’s opinion matters and how to avoid mass overload of them.

Why Are You Attached To It?

What is the reason you open social media and start to use it each and everyday?

Is it notifications?

Is it FOMO?

Is it habit?

Either way, you need to identify why you use it if you want to understand how to change it.

These daily opinions on these apps can be doing you harm if you are feeling not like yourself or are feeling constantly behind.

This is why you need to understand that only YOUR opinion matters.

Not John.

Not Steve.

Not Sarah.

Just yours.

You are you by your actions, not by other people’s opinions of you.

And with that sentence above, can you start to unlock the freedom of doing you for you and only you.

Opinions come and go, especially regarding temporary events.

For example, when you make an embarrassing event occur, like falling over in the street and in your head you think ‘this is horrible everyone is laughing and will remember me by this’.

But ultimately, who cares?

It’ll be forgotten about by tomorrow by all those random people and you’ll most likely never even see them again.

Same applies to most of social media.

You need to learn to strive to not care and watch how you are no longer limited.

You’re not living your life as you, you’re living your life as opinions if you continue to allow their dictatorship over your life

And those opinions are letting you and your future self down.

So, remove the app, gain your confidence back and just be you.

At the end of the day, who cares?

Your life is your life, so go live it.

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A question I continuously ask myself when going through life.

I use it as a means of measurement - the more proud I am, the bigger the achievement.

Being ‘proud’ is linked to ‘pride' which is one of the seven deadly sins.

Does this mean I can’t be proud?

Let’s take a look.

Crossroads

If being proud can lead to arrogance and ignorance then is it worth chasing?

Well, for me, I like to look back on the day, ask myself ‘did you do what you said you would do?’

• Wake up on time?

• Avoid procrastination?

• Hit the gym?

If the answers to these are ‘yes’ then I feel proud - I’ve accomplished what I set out to do and my brain feels rewarded.

Does this mean I have an ego or become arrogant?

No.

However, if I start shouting about it and waving it in people’s faces thinking I’m unstoppable, then yes, I can become arrogant.

For me, it’s about perspectives - same with all the other seven deadly sins.

If I take an extra cupcake at a party does this mean I fall under gluttony? I’m technically over-indulging yet it may be a one off time.

The point is, it’s about perspective on them.

Just because yourself or myself feel proud of an achievement we strived so hard for doesn’t mean we can’t celebrate or even better, use it to our advantage.

If our answers to the above questions were no, then surely that could help fuel you?

Chasing that proudness or feeling of accomplishment when you’ve smashed your day surely can be viewed as a good thing, right?

Spreading the Proudness

Making yourself proud first is vital.

If people around you flood you with comments on your ability yet you don’t fully believe or are proud yourself then it can dampen your ability.

First make yourself proud.

You need to be your #1 fan before you let other people be fans of you.

Solidify yourself first.

Once you are proud, then you can let others in.

If you don’t have that backbone, you have no self-belief.

And if you have no self-belief, you have no confidence or chance to improve your ability.

Establish self-belief, your inner self and once you believe it, you’ll start to be more proud = snowball effect.

For example, that long list of tasks that you have but never fully complete, you’re always left never satisfied.

Now if your family and friends around you say you are smashing it and they are super proud, yet you yourself know you have lacked, it can start to put you off the tasks or even worse, give you a false sense of proudness from external sources - rather than the one that counts.

YOU!

If you can do it, then others around you can be inspired to do it too!

Believe that you can do it then when others say they are proud of you, you feel even more positive and want to strive to continue creating waves.

Everyday is a blessing and if we make the most of it, we will start to feel more proud.

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You’re now a comfortable human with endless potential - but also have the opportunity to do nothing/little but still live with ease.

The choice is yours - you can choose whether to enjoy the new found life of comfort and not push yourself or strive for change.

Either way, don’t waste your opportunity that you’ve been given.

If you’re looking to push yourself, read below.

How to Maximise your Advantage?

Recognising that you have an advantage due to your location is key and the first step.

As once you realise and accept it, you can now start to use it to your advantage by now having the direction in which you should aim in.

Feel like you’re swaying away from your target?

Remember the reasons why you should do it, not why you shouldn’t.

You’ll always think of reasons why you shouldn’t:

• I’m tired

• I can’t be bothered

• It’s too much work

Remove them.

If you set a deadline, stick to it.

If you set a goal, stick to it.

If you set a plan, follow it.

It’s as simple as that.

Hitting that deadline doesn’t have to be tomorrow nor does your goal being achieved have to be tomorrow - it’s about the mindset you adopt by striving everyday to achieve it.

It gives you confidence.

It gives the ability to increase your self-accountability.

It gives you a higher probability that you’ll do the tasks you want/need to do each and every day, slowly pushing you closer to your ‘end’ destination.

When you’re not feeling the gym for example, those are the days you can see the most amount of growth if you do go.

Because you’ve beaten your mind.

You’ve said even though I don’t feel like it, I’ve done it anyways.

That feeling of triumph will come in and it’s addicting.

You can do it and you will continue to do it.

When you’re comfortable, you have to push boundaries that your mind has set.

And you can keep beating your mind each time you practice this.

10 minutes are better than 0 minutes.

One foot in front of the other is better than no movement at all.

At the end of the day, you only get one life - you are in control and can ultimately continue pushing yourself or stop and waste this beautiful opportunity you were given.

And remember, ride the ebbs and flows of life.

When in a flow state, maximise your effort.

When in an ebb, recognise and accept it and push through it knowing a flow state will be upon you sooner rather than later.

But don’t stop pushing in either of them.

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The classic YOLO.

‘You only live once’ for those who don’t know.

And that phrase, that acronym alone should be enough motivation for you to realise you don’t have time to waste.

Inner Flame

Everyone, whether you feel it right now or not, has this inner flame inside of them burning.

Sometimes it burns less than other times, due to your environment and external factors, but it’s still there.

This here is a reminder that YOU have the ability to pour gas back onto that flame to help it burn strong again.

How?

By always reverting back to that strong ‘why’ that you have.

That should be your holy grail in times of despair.

That should be your best friend when you have no one near.

That should be your cheat code when you have challenges to overcome.

Would You Be Happy?

Now imagine this morbid thought with me for a few moments.

If today was your last day, would you be happy?

Would you be happy with the progress you’ve made in life?

With the relationships you’ve created?

With the lives you’ve impacted?

With the legacy you’re leaving behind?

If your answer is no to any of those questions, then that alone should be enough to get you back on track.

Go out and change it to a yes.

That’s only done through action, each and every single day.

If you don’t regret anything, are living a fulfilling life (subjective) and are creating a positive impact to those around you, then I’d say you’re doing a pretty good job.

But then again, my opinion doesn’t matter here.

It’s you vs you at the end of the day.

So, if this day is your last day, would you happy?

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Your consciousness starts to develop as a small child and as you experience more of life, you learn more about it.

As you age, you naturally gain more experience; both good and bad.

The experiences you experienced in past have shaped your present and will project your future.

Now while each experience is different, especially amongst each other, it’s important to understand not to waste them.

Both the good and bad ones create memories for us and also lessons; on how to grow, to be better and to just live life in a way that we want to live it.

How do you know what you like without trying a couple things first?

It’s also important to establish that no one has any actual idea as to why we exist.

Of course, religions and hypotheses have been created to give it some explanation but overall, there is no set definition.

And with no set definition, you are able to run freely and wildly to explore what YOU want your life to look like and ultimately, end up being.

In the Western world, most people wake up and crack on with some sort of routine which also involves a job.

This alone is a blessing as some people wake up and instantly have to think about survival; something our ancestors had to deal with for centuries.

We’ve fortunately been born into a time where that is no longer needed - and this should be enough thought for you to realise you shouldn’t waste your life potential.

However, in case you needed more…

The Question That Helps Shape Your Life

If this life is so rare/blessed, especially in the western world, then why waste it?

Why not try to strive to your full potential as a human and continue evolving?

I believe this comfort we have been given, the luxury, has created weakness.

When a hurdle now comes, we can just hide in our comfortable home with our food and bed and try something new or different later on.

There’s no embracement of pain or suffering, just comfort, pleasure and safety.

The stronger the mental fortitude, the more hurdles you can jump and that can only be trained through more experience.

You have power to impact, positively or negatively, people’s lives each day yet you choose not to impact at all?

Now that’s a waste of YOUR potential.

Your ability as a human to impact is a blessing and shouldn’t be wasted!

How to Reignite?

1. Know who you are and what you want.

Once again, it derives from experiences.

Who you are and what you are doing right now have been influenced and impacted by the experiences from your past.

You have the ability to change that and those around you, but it’s about recognising you aren’t where you want to be nor are the person you deeply want to be.

2. Get situated. You need to help yourself before you help others.

Imagine you’re standing on one leg because you're off balance as you know who you are but you aren’t that person yet.

If you try to help someone, you’ll fall off balance and thus, both you and the person you tried to help will actually be worse off.

Help yourself, then help others.

3. Everyone has different innate skills - don’t waste them.

You were born with gifts your peers weren’t - just like they were born with gifts you weren’t.

Don’t waste them!

Use them to help reach your true potential and positively impact the world around you by improving each and everyday.

Remember, that potential you have right now, today, only will continue to dwindle until you cease to exist.

It’s now or never.

Don’t waste it…

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The quicker you understand and accept that, the quicker you will realise continuous comparison is pointless.

Social media of course has accentuated comparison through its accessibility and speed but this doesn’t mean you should become accustom to its effect.

How to Flip the Narrative?

To flip the narrative, we have to establish that it is wrong.

Comparison every now and then is fine and healthy as it’s a great guide as to what is going on around in your environment, peers and life - just a subtle sense check.

However, it’s the consistent daily comparison to people you will never meet nor know that you exist that leads to consistent doubt in yourself, in your looks, in your ability to achieve something bigger than just yourself, is the narrative we must avoid.

Examples always work best, especially if they are relatable.

When driving your car, you need some type of fuel to use it - after that is depleted, you need to refill.

Now imagine you are driving but instead of looking and keeping track of your fuel gauge, you’re constantly looking around at other people’s levels of fuel and how much they have left.

You don’t allow anytime to glance and understand your level, just continuous comparison of the drivers around you and before you know it, you’re out of fuel waiting for help.

Seems silly right?

Same applies to your grass.

The grass is your life; it’s you and everything you provide to the world.

If you ignore your grass, not water it or allow sunshine to get through, it’ll start to turn to dirt, with no sprouting seeds.

This is what happens when you compare constantly.

So of course, the grass will always be greener on the other side if you are not taking care of your own grass.

Flipping the narrative begins here.

With the idea that you have the ability and should be becoming the farmer of your own grass, your own land - not the spectator of others.

How to Use it to Our Advantage?

If we recognise and accept that the grass will always be greener elsewhere at some point (based on the first line of this post), then we can also use this as motivation.

Just because you have started a new sport, lets say Tennis, and everyone around you is better doesn’t mean you should instantly give up.

You need to harness this as motivation and adopt the mindset of: ‘Hey, this person is better than me, let me learn how and start to improve’.

Rather than: ‘ This person is so much better, I suck - there’s is no point in trying’.

Remember, your grass can ALWAYS become greener just like the grass is ALWAYS greener on the other side.

You just need to utilise the saying to your advantage, not get disheartened.

Become the farmer, and watch how fresh your grass can grow.

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Your plan is to work ‘harder’ by putting in the extra hours before and after work, showing that you are present and dedicated to your role.

As each week goes by, you start to notice yourself get more and more fatigued but you remind yourself that you’re halfway through and you’re close to your goal, so you keep pushing.

By week 9, the final week, you’ve hit THE WALL.

You are mentally and physically exhausted, and you are struggling to focus however, at least your boss has just offered you a promotion.

Welcome to burnout.

Continuous reps at the gym lead to muscle fatigue just as continuous reps in the mind (long hours of focused work) lead to brain fatigue.

Yet, we’ve accepted that it is responsible and correct to take breaks from the gym but not take physical breaks from work.

Why is this?

The Car Analogy

I believe an analogy on any situation always helps explain the point by making it relatable to most.

Imagine you’re driving a car, you’ve got your foot on the gas pedal and you’re heading to a destination 8 hours away that you can’t complete in one go.

Now along the road, you may get traffic that forces you to vary your foot on the pedal (slow down and speed up) but ultimately, your foot is down the majority of the time.

It’s now hit hour 4, you desperately need the toilet, stomach is rumbling and you’re low on gas (I know, very poor MPG).

This here is the turning point.

You decide to continue on with your journey rather than opting for a well needed break to try and complete the journey in one go.

Hour 8 rolls by and you’ve made it yet you’re fresh out of gas, are shaking with hunger and have wet yourself - not an ideal scenario.

Burnout from work is just the same.

You get yourself in a scenario which isn’t ideal, you’ve lost motivation, you’ve lost focus and lost the will to continue cracking on in some cases.

It’s dangerous too as it can last more than a few days if you’ve been physically and mentally pushing yourself for a while and that is why it is imperative that you learn your limits and slowly test them.

How to increase your Burnout Limit

Each of us have different stages that we are at in terms of ability to work without breaks.

School set a foundation for most of us yet we didn’t always partake in subjects we were passionate about.

For work, you may have pushed yourself for a week and when it comes to the weekend you like to completely switch off - that’s quite common and usually healthy if maximum effort has been applied throughout the week.

However, if really want to challenge yourself and strive outside your comfort zone, try going longer than a week.

Try implementing some more work either into a Sunday evening or a bit longer on one of the weekdays.

Start gradual and work your way up.

Not everyone desires this but if you are looking to start a side business with a passion of yours, you’ll have to sacrifice some personal time outside of your normal job to actually get it moving.

If you start to feel run down and lethargic, start to slow down and take a day or 2 off to recuperate.

Remember your foot needs to be varying on the pedal, slowly picking up speed and slowing down during traffic, just like your mind and body need during the week when unexpected errands occur.

Furthermore, the fuel for us here is energy, and it isn’t given to us through food - it’s through rest.

It requires time to have no thoughts - a clear and peaceful mind.

And this can only be achieved through rest.

How to give your Mind Rest?

You can’t just stop, especially if you’re driven to completing this task or halfway through your journey in the car analogy.

If you emergency break in a car, of course you come to a stop, but it’s so sudden that it can disrupt the environment around it (other cars) or even cause the car to need a restart.

What you need is a plan to stop - you say, ‘by hour 4, I plan on stopping to eat some food, fill up the car and head to the bathroom’.

Same in life, you plan your time to rest and allow yourself time booked out just for you to help truly rest your mind.

Just like rest days in the gym, your mind needs to rest some days too and the most common output is alcohol.

Albeit effective, it’s not particularly the healthiest but does provide some fun times every now and then!

Either way, the main action you should be doing is breaking up your routine to feel a true ‘foot off the pedal’ feeling.

So that when you come back, you’re not hungry, you feel relieved from using the bathroom and comfortable behind the wheel with no stress about the lack of fuel.

This translates to you being able to tackle problems faster and stronger and therefore more efficiently in your job.

A simple problem which may seem so complicated at the time can be fixed just by having that mental break.

It’s a basic solution overlooked as society is pushing us to be in grind mode 24/7/365 - especially for younger men.

But without a healthy mind and body, you cannot live a healthy life.

And without a healthy life, how can it be fulfilling?

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The choice of whether to leave a good lasting impression or a bad one.

You get to set the standard for who people think you are and how you act.

Each of these interactions are vital because they enable you to truly impact things that are greater than just yourself.

Not to mention, it’s free too.

Impress the World, Not Just Yourself

As we go about our day-to-day lives, it’s extremely easy and super common to get lost in our own ways.

We forget to actually be human.

We forget we all share emotions both good and bad.

We forget that we have the ability to change each other’s day with a small action.

This is what it’s about when leaving an impression.

When you meet a new person for the first time, it’s a new opportunity to leave a good lasting impression.

Not only can you improve their day but also, you never know what doors it could open for you down the line too; they may even be the ones helping you when you’re having a bad day randomly, in a few months time.

So next time you have the opportunity to indulge in a new conversation, or perform an act of kindness like holding the door open - take it and continue spreading positivity through your words and actions.

You never know what your first impression may spark.

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We wish for betterness but it doesn’t occur.

But why?

It’s because we lack action.

We have the desire to change our current position.

But that doesn’t equate to change - it’s just the starting point of it.

How to Change?

You need to be the catalyst to kickstart your life.

Don’t wait around for one because none will come.

And even if it does come, you’ve wasted countless days and energy not striving to be the person you should be.

You’ve got too comfortable and lazy.

This laziness fosters lack of change.

You need to just do it.

Execute.

Stop holding back and waiting - you need to attack, advance and move.

Techniques to Get Momentum!

A task that takes 2 minutes or less, execute on it.

Use the small amount of time required to do it and gain that completed task under your belt.

Feel that feeling of accomplishment; no matter how small or menial the task is.

Using this momentum is the secret to success.

It allows small actions to convert into big ones.

And it’s the big ones that give you the bigger results and satisfaction - but are derived from starting on the small ones.

How to Start?

Ask yourself, am I trying to get to a better place?

If yes, am I going towards it?

If no, get started!

Apply yourself.

You only get this one life, stop wasting it.

If you look back in 1 year, or even 1 month, will you be happy with the current effort you are putting in now?

No?

Then crack on!

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You wake up at 06:30.

You get ready and leave by 07:10.

You grab a coffee on the way at 07:20.

You arrive at the office for 08:00.

This is routine.

A specific set of daily rituals or habits that people do at certain times.

Each is unique to it’s owner yet we can all relate to having one.

Now what happens when you break it?

Momentum is vanished.

You lose the stride you had of building this up for the last 30 days.

You wake up at 07:00 - you’re late.

You leave by 07:25 - not showered.

You don’t have time for coffee at the usual 07:20.

You arrive at the office for 08:10 - 10 minutes late.

Now one day where this happens is extremely normal and common, but it also the deciding moment too.

How to Fix a Broken Routine?

Remember, day 1 of a broken routine is the MOST crucial.

You must accept and recognise you have broken it.

It’s the moment of choice where you decide whether you want to continue with your old routine or start to shape it into something new.

And to go back to your original routine after this will take even more willpower and effort.

You decide.

The next morning, you either wake up at 06:30 or accept a new routine will start to form.

What Makes a Good Habit?

A good habit in my eyes is one that supports your views towards living a fulfilling life.

Now while a fulfilling life is subjective, that element of subjectivity is what makes it more satisfying.

The routine described above may not entice you which is fine and good - you’ve recognised a routine you don’t want to follow.

Enjoy the journey of experimenting with personalised routines that still contain elements of goodness (healthiness).

How?

Trial and error.

Now while you are in your trial and error phase of a new habit or routine you want to follow, embrace all mistakes to use as lessons.

If you try waking up at 06:30, 06:35, 06,40 etc, but none work, don’t be disheartened.

Keep reminding yourself of the long-term vision which is to live a fulfilling life.

And to live a fulfilling life you must build good long-term habits which take time!

The Struggle of Following Habits!

Most good habits don’t provide the instant gratification which makes it harder to continue with said habit when results aren’t shown straight away or even in the short-term.

Easy example as always is the gym.

You don’t rock up on day 1 and by day 2 have insane ab definition.

It takes time.

It takes effort.

And it takes a whole new version of yourself to get there.

Various studies show different amounts of days that it takes to build a habit but the average it seems is 66 days.

So when starting out on building a new one, keep that timeline in the back of your mind.

Because when you creep to day 20 or 30 and you start to struggle, remember you are only 1/3 or 1/2 of the way there - so keep going!

Continue to push yourself back out of your comfort zone and continue pushing to strive for that good habit.

As building new habits or routine is not in your comfort zone otherwise, you would have them already!

And if you find yourself struggling for reason, think of your ‘why’ and think of that fulfilling life you wish you were living.

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Correct.

But the illusion is that freedom and/or choice isn’t given through structure when in fact, it is the genetic makeup of it.

You create structure in your life through your routines and habits that YOU choose and in turn, arguably, if you are choosing to make these routines, then you are having that freedom.

However, you may debate freewill here and whether our choices are determined or not based on nature and nurture - but that is a whole other debate.

So if having structure in our life is so key, then why do we not strive for it?

Is it not there to keep us sane?

To help create balance in our lives?

Well for me, it was the illusion.

I believed that routine and structure were hindering me from experiencing life the way I wanted to yet as we mentioned above, that is wrong.

If you feel like you are not living the life you want to - you need to ask yourself why?

What routines or structures do you have in place that are holding you back or not aligning with your life’s purpose?

Let’s understand what structure can look like.

What is Structure?

Structure, as I like to imagine it, is pillars in your life.

The classic 4 are wealth, health, family and happiness, however you can easily create more and even use those 4 pillars above as umbrellas to smaller pillars within.

Using the structure of the 4 pillars, what pillars do you have?

You may have heard of the saying ‘all your eggs in one basket’ and it is very relevant here.

If you put all your eggs per se, into health, then the other 3 pillars aren’t actually going to be upheld.

They will start to deteriorate and thus, you’ll only be left with 1.

Why is that bad?

Well ask yourself, if that one pillar, health in this example, gets removed, then what?

What pillars do you have left?

0.

If you have no pillars left, what is your purpose.

And I believe that this is what we call ego death and experience it when we have nothing going for us.

Sometimes, we can imagine we have nothing going for us too because of the overwhelming feeling of negative emotions that can cloud our judgement objectively.

However, the point still stands.

Aim for More!

You don’t want to end up in the example above for reasons stated.

So what do you do?

Well you put your eggs into as many baskets as you can.

Spread yourself into different aspects of life that give you that fulfilment from it.

You like sports? Start playing one consistently.

You aren’t spending enough time with family? Create specific days or parts of the year with them.

The more structure you have in your life, the more pillars that will be holding you up.

So if the wind comes and blows 1 or even 2 down, you’ve got plenty of others to take care of you while you rebuild those pillars.

This will allow you to get more out of the time you are given to spend on things you want to spend the time on.

Final Thoughts

I wanted to touch on all your eggs in one basket again as I feel this is actually necessary in the short-term when you are striving to become better at something to begin with.

It’s the idea that trying to extend this long-term, is the idea that won’t actually be viable and you’ll not only lose yourself in the chase, but all those pillars around you.

So, use this time to think, what pillars do I have?

Are they being supported?

If not, let’s get to building around them.

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It happens especially when the situation or outcome of the situation involves another human.

Our emotions are involved and thus meaning both our mind and body are.

For example, you’ve been out with your friends catching up at a meal and one of them drops a comment which was deemed as ‘banter’ but after the meal, you can’t help but to keep thinking about it.

Their intention wasn’t hostile but it may have touched an insecurity of yours.

That is where you jump down the rabbit hole and an endless invisible spiral occurs of you thinking if they said it for x reason or y reason or z reason.

It truly is an endless spiral until you start to accept that keeping life simple will lead to less stress.

Simple Life Does Not Mean Boring!

The word simple here can be misinterpreted as boring and dull however, it is far from it.

It is the key to unlocking more from life, just by doing less.

Lets use the example again above instead this time, you are trying to live a more simple life.

The comment said to you not only enters one ear and out the other, but you laugh with everyone at the table and enjoy the rest of the night; overthinking free.

All that previously wasted energy is now being used to live more in the moment and enjoy it.

Letting it go has just allowed you to experience more - less is more.

Now with this new superpower, the hardest part is switching the last part of your mindset.

When an outcome or situation is so simple yet you are used to more complexity, it can lead to the same cycle as before of overthinking and therefore overcomplication.

Why is this so simple? It used to be so hard. Am I doing something wrong?

Just remember, we’ve kept it simple for a reason.

More simple, less stress.

This will allow for plenty of new opportunities to open up as more time goes on and you’ll be able to experience more, for doing less (internally)!

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Without purpose, do we truly exist?

Without existence, is life being wasted?

The value you are able to add is infinite and so vast that it should be a lifelong mission of yours.

Think about the times where you engaged in a piece of content online or in person - did it add value to your life?

Value doesn’t have to mean productive necessarily but it does correlate with good.

It can provide you value through other ways like emotional, psychological or even monetarily.

Are you adding value?

Do you strive to add value to the environment through recycling?

Do you strive to add value to friends through emotional support during a tough time?

Do you strive to add value through spreading your knowledge on a niche to others at no cost?

You’ll notice the above questions all have one common denominator.

They all link with people.

So the overarching question is; do you strive to add value to people’s lives?

Why add value?

As mentioned at the start, to continue to have purpose, you should strive to add value.

Adding to that, have you heard of the butterfly effect?

Put simply, the butterfly effect explains that one small action can influence a much larger system due to the world being so connected.

For example, a butterfly flying around some plants in the US can cause a dust devil in the Sahara desert.

Adding value can cause the butterfly effect.

If you strive to add value, which is always positive as value is intrinsically good, not bad, then you are spreading good.

For example, you are an expert in Marine Biology and you start a YouTube channel to help spread some knowledge through free content.

This content reaches many people and inspires them to add value (not just knowledge) in their own lives, which then spreads even further.

You can see how one ripple can cause a tsunami here.

That alone should be enough motivation for you to start!

How to add value?

Be you and be kind.

Being authentic is key as it creates new perspectives & growth for humanity.

And, find something you are good at.

Not everyone will be talented at art just as not everyone will be talented at singing.

Find your superpowers, and hone in on them.

Once mastered, think, ‘value, value, value’.

Create content online or speak about it to people in person - see how you can push your knowledge to help others.

Being human and listening can give enough emotional support to most too; not to mention the obvious factor of money being given to those who need it more will help.

There is an abundance of opportunity to provide value each and every day, you just need to change your perspective to see all the doors waiting to be opened in front of you.

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